Sunday, March 22, 2009

The Heart of a True Mother

I have thought long and hard about how to explain to my adopted children why a mother gives her child up. Since I have never been in a position to have to do this I asked God to help me find the truth when it comes to this question that all my adopted children will eventually ask. As usual God gave me the answer from his infinite wisdom. The truth came to me as I read from the book of Kings. Solomon was presented with a curious dilemma...two women, one child. Both women had given birth within three days of each other. After one mother had accidentally smothered her baby as it slept she exchanged her dead child for the live one. When the mother of the live baby awoke to find a dead baby next to her she was horrified. As she examined the little one more closely she realized that the dead baby she found was not her own. Both women appealed to King Solomon for a solution. Of course you know that the wise king called for a sword to cut the infant in two halves so each woman would get a fair share of the baby. One woman shouted, "Let the child live, give it to the other woman." The woman who had switched the babies said, " Let the child die. If I cannot have it, then no one shall have it." As these words are spoken it becomes clear what the heart of a true mother looks like...Life, not death. I have often wondered how a woman could choose to abort a baby, or why another woman in very difficult circumstances would choose to give her child to another woman to nurture and raise. This story makes it clear that a woman who truly is the mother of the child, regardless of her situation, will care more for that child than her own circumstances. Where one woman would choose death, another would release her child into the arms of a stranger in order that her baby might live. Each of the birth mother's of my adopted children have chosen to give life to their babies. There will never be a question about if their birth mothers acted with the heart of a "True Mother" or not because they need only to look at their own life to see that her noble act is complete and they life because of it.


Michelle said...

What an incredible lesson! Thank you for giving me something to think about and consider. I've long desired to adopt, & have often pondered what it might be like to have that conversation. Solomon's life offered so many good morsels of wisdom. Thanks for writing about this. :)

milreb said...

Thank you for your thoughts on this. My husband and I just had this conversation on Saturday as we prepare to adopt our first child. One of the tricky things we discussed was how to talk about his biological mother's love (some caution to even use this word) and sacrifice while giving him a sense of security that WE love him but WE aren't going anywhere. I am wondering if any of your kids have asked you about this. I really appreciate your thoughts and perspective. We are learning much from your insight and experience as we prepare for our adoption.

Steve and Anna said...

Thank you for writing your thoughts regarding this question. I love how this story illustrates a mother's desire for life for her child. I know it will help me as we share with our son and future children!!!

Cheryl Grantom said...

Thanks for the insight from God. I will remember this lesson and use it when the time(s) come when our kids ask questions. It always is hard to know what to say.

Anonymous said...


I'm a new blog reader who found you thru "A Bushel and a Peck"....Loved this post and will definately keep it in mind as I speak with my children about their adoptions.

Lisa H.
Eastern WA

Kari:) said...

Theresa, I love this post!!! Thank you for sharing a mother's heart. I pray over Zoie everyday that she will understand "why" deep in her soul.
Love & Miss you!!!

Dietrich & Amy Lusse said...

As always...great!! :) thanks for taking the time to share.

shawn and tisha said...

Thanks for sharing this. :)